Monday, April 20, 2009

I AM ENOUGH

If you have been following my blog, then you know I'm taking an online course called "A Life Well Crafted." As part of this course we get a new journaling prompt each Monday. The last two weeks have been very interesting. Last week (4/13) I missed the prompt getting ready for my trip to Portland. When I got home and looked it up, here is the question:


What is the simplest yet most important thing you know? My answer: I am enough.


Intellectually I know this to be true. Sometimes though - emotionally, physically, spiritually - I have difficulty believing it and loving myself as I am, faults and all. I am human. I make mistakes. (a lot). I don't always manage to control my temper and I am not always the nicest person to be around. I have issues. I'm not always the most consistent parent. Sometimes I don't enforce the rules enough, other times maybe I am too strict and keeping my girls on too short a leash. But I always mean well and always want the best for my children. Making mistakes in parenting does not mean I love them any less. What I know most of all, deep down in my heart, is that at any given time I am doing the best I can with what I have and what I know. I hope that is what they grow up understanding. Not that I was perfect, but that I did the best I knew how.


Which brings me to today's question. What do you like to read?


I just finished the Twilight series - devoured most of the last book on my flight to Portland and finished it while I was there. The Twilight series is a young adult fictional romance with vampires. It was a good read, mostly just entertaining.
But I liked Stephenie Meyers (the author) enough that I picked up her next book "The Host" to read on the trip home from Portland. If you like fiction that has a broader message and leaves you thinking, I highly recommend this book. It gets you pondering the question of exactly what it means to be human. And thinking about all the different emotions that go along with being human. Could we appreciate great joy and love, if there were not sorrow and hate to compare it to? to balance it out? I'm not going to give away any of the plot, but consider it for your book list.
I also enjoy reading self-help type books if they are ones that speak to me. My all time favorite remains "Excuse Me, Your Life is Waiting" by Lynn Grabhorn. Right now I'm reading "I Thought It Was Just Me" and following the read-along on the author's blog. But I'm almost ready for some new material. So what do you like to read? Any recommendations?

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Road to Recovery, Creative Mojo, Age of Enlightenment, and other Random Stuff.

I've had this blog post rattling around inside my head for days now, but between being sick, work, two 7 hour round-trip drives to Susquehanna University, and just spending some family time on Easter weekend, I just haven't had time to put it together. Now I've got a free 1/2 hour before I head to the airport so here goes...

Road to Recovery: Yes, I've been noticeably absent. Because I was sick. For two weeks. I had the sore throat, cough, congestion, body aches, all I want to do is sleep thing that's been going around. And trying to sleep propped up so I could breathe aggravated my sciatic nerve so then my back hurt so bad I could barely walk. I finally did three nights of Nyquil-induced coma and I'm feeling much better, thank you. Does mean I missed a solid week of Curves and my strength dropped, so my workouts have been less than par. And I stayed away from Treadmill for awhile, so I'll be back to square one there. But I will be back.
As soon as I get back from Portland that is. Yes, heading out for a four day work-related trip to Portland. Don't envy me. I get to spend all day Wednesday in a hotel conference room with 25 other attorneys talking current issues facing our MLS businesses. Yawn. I'll try to hit the fitness room while I'm there. The upside to Portland - I'm going to the read the last of the Twilight series books on the flight to/from. Yeah! Escape into vampire world!
Creative Mojo: So I think maybe my Creative Mojo is coming back. I feel right now like I'm back in college juggling a full course load, but I'm LOVING this! I'm currently enrolled in three Big Picture Scrapbooking courses - Life Well Crafted (year long), Library of Memories, and Wellness Journey. The Wellness Journey one just got started and it is all about embracing fitness and getting your body moving. I NEED this class! I'm also taking Type + Writer at the Jessica Sprague site. Type + Writer is a combo journaling/digi-scrapping class. Check out my first two layouts!
The Age of Enlightenment: Now this second layout is interesting because it comes at a time when I'm also doing a "read-along" with author Brene Brown on her blog following the book "I Thought It Was Just Me". This book is about dealing with shame and moving into shame-resilience which is a hard concept to explain, but very eye-opening work. At any rate, I've decided having gotten into all these online courses and what not that the 40's definitely is the Age of Enlightenment. It is that point when you finally realize that trying to be the person everyone else wants you to be just isn't working for you and you need to learn to just BE YOURSELF. You need to take all those versions of yourself that you've created to meet everyone else's needs - mother, wife, friend, employee, etc. - and incorporate all those selves into one authentic whole person. And even more than that - a whole person who takes the time to nurture and love herself and meet her own needs. I'm working on it. But man, what a concept. And why does it take us this long into our human existence to figure this out anyway???
American Idol - I'm thinking Adam has a good shot at winning, although he's really not my thing. Lil has a great voice but she isn't doing a very good job at showcasing it. Love Danny Gorkey, but don't think he's the best. Personally I'm having a hard time deciding between Matt and Kris. What do you think?
Wii Fit - so we got this game for Easter. And knowing NOTHING about it or how it works I get on and my kids click me through the fitness test. My brain has a really hard time translating how those pictures on the t.v. are supposedly telling me how to adjust my weight right vs. left foot. I finally got it, but apparently too late. The Wii tells me "So the balance test isn't your forte. Do you find yourself tripping over your own feet?" Aw, come on - give an old lady a break! It also told me I'm "obese" (okay, I knew that) and that my Wii Fit age is "49" - not so bad considering I'm almost 48. But my 50 year old DH has a Wii Fit age of 37. God, sometimes I hate men. Anyway, after Portland, I'm going to try the yoga and stretching stuff on Wii. Anyone out there do this? Does it work?
Time's Up! Okay, gotta run now. Airport and Twilight, here I come!